I only get little Larry 1 day a month; court ordered. His mother is a touch petty, some would say spiteful. I did have a drink & drug problem, but I never used in front of the boy & I've been clean since the divorce. My only vice now is my beautiful son. Our day together is the highlight of my month. However! Our latest day was spoiled by Mr Segura & his comedic fiddlings. The morning of our day was spent at the seaside, catching crabs, feeding the seagulls & writing our names in the sand. The afternoon was reserved for some netflix and chill (as the cool kids say). I put the Telly on for little Larry, then went to the kitchen & started making some homemade honey-popcorn. My domestic bliss was slit open by hysterical laughter coming from my son in the living room. He sounded, insane! Alarmed, I rushed to his aid. I found him holding the television remote, bewitched by an odd, onscreen, bald man who was covered in excrement & uttering the most shocking profanity. I ripped the television plug from its socket. Children mimic what they see and my son is no different. He has taken to smearing himself in human waste whilst screaming the most horrid laughing imaginable. Fortunately I only have him one day a month. Thank you Mr Tom.

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